let's cook up a lil love...

PAELLA

History:-
HIIIIII!! Yeah, I kinda got this sorted now
er, this was coz I got bored of making sushi for Xmas challengers, so I decided to do a new recipe. (also, someone else was making sushi, coz they figured out how easy it was to make, so they stole my signature dish… thanks!!) anyways, so I got this and I made too much apparently? so BLEH to you lot. I had to finish it all off at home…

Ingredients:- (for two, I think?)
� Basically you need about 500g of meat? I dunno seems a lot, actually. you know what? Screw Gary Rhodes! John’s going solo!! Lol
� BIG saucepan. And BIG wooden spoon, the one you use to hit people with?
� Basically, (again?) you need a cool sausage? I don’t remember the name, but it’s kind of a really hard salami. I’ll find the name later. Just one will do.
� Then any other meat, like chicken, chiken’s nice.
� 3oz of green beans
� 2oz of whatever you can find in the fridge
� 1 big tomato, all chopped up
� 1 teaspoon of paprika
� 2-3 table spoons of not so expensive olive oil
� A tiny tiny lil bit of saffron? seriously... tiny tiny bit? very expensive
� Salt, pepper, the works.
� 1 twig of rosemary
� 375g of short grain rice. Risotto rice will do just fine.
� And 1 and a half pints of water. Normal, cold, natural water.

What to do:-
� Cook the meat first, in the saucepan, to lock in the juices, and just cook it properly, otherwise you’ll have people with food poisoning, and we don’t want that, do we??
� Add the tomatoes, nicely chopped. And the beans as well, also nicely chopped.
� Then put the paprika and saffron and salt and pepper and mix.
� Add the rice, and the water as well, then cook on the highest possible flame (not coz I’m a pyromaniac) for 10 minutes. Then reduce the heat and cook for another 10 mins with the lid on.
� Add the rosemary and you can serve it from the saucepan, or put it in a nice looking bowl.

And there you have it! Paella!

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OMELETTE

History:-
Woooo! as you probably know, if you ask anyone on the planet “can you cook?” they’ll probs say “yeah, kinda. I can make omelettes?” BUT! Can they make it well? This is my recipe. I make it up and feed it to random people.

Ingredients:-
� Bowl to mix the stuff in (not too big)
� 3 eggs. Should be from a chicken, so you should check. Free range is good for you. Well, not really, but it sure tastes better
� A splash of milk.
� Mozzarella cheese. Or cheddar if you?re feeling British. Well, any cheese, but I like mozzarella, so ner.
� Some meat, unless you’re a veggie of course. PANCETTA :D :S
� Salt, pepper, and the works! whatever the works actually is
� MOST VITAL INGREDIENT (after egg) Tabasco sauce la! to spice up your life
� HERBS!!! Mustn’t forget herbs. I cheat, and use dried Italian seasoning, so I don’t have to choose the herbs LOL. Er, coriander, basil, oregano, parsley. I think that’s about it for the lil herbs
� Big saucepan (the one you use to cook eggs, maybe…)
� Cooking oil
� And plate.

What to do:-
� Break the eggs into the bowl, and then… shove EVERYTHING else into it! no order. Well, everything doesn’t include the big saucepan or the plate, for all you witty people out there.
� Mix very well.
� Heat the saucepan at the same time! Sorry, forgot to mention that…
� Put the oil in.
� And then put the egg mixture in and then watch everything cook nicely!
� There’s a technique to this, but I seriously cba to explain. Well, I cba and everyone likes their omelettes differently, so you cook it however you want. It includes flipping at some point, so be careful…
� Put it onto the plate.

And there you have it! whatever it was… oh, omelette
You might not like it, depends on your taste, really.